Freezing bones and frigid souls
in the winter cruel and cold
life survives the silent death
while slowly growing in earths depth
Teeming life is long since gone
but effervescent will keeps many strong
bright blue and white, deep black of night
my mind lays restless until dawns light
Chris,
ReplyDeleteThank you for posting this :). I like the way the visual appearance of the poem on the blog (and page). The poem is written in two stanzas that are well balanced. The lines appear mostly symmetrical as well, being about the same length. The perspective of the speaker in the poem is also notable as the tone seems to highlight themes associated with winter. The harsh diction also helps to simulate the difficult conditions of the winter seasons as well with “Freezing bones” (1), “frigid souls” (1), “cruel” (2), “cold (2) and “silent death” (3). The word choice also focuses on a different perspective, one that considers the other forms of life involved with a winter’s transition: “life survives the silent death” (3).
I appreciate the word “Teeming” (5)—it has a lot of unique life to it, and I think it adds personality to the poem. The poem has a colorful timbre to it concerning different shades of cold and blue, white and black. The prompt urges you to consider different senses in relation to a place and season; I think you do this very well while considering seeing and feeling. This poem successfully relates the effect of a winter’s cold, but ends in a manner that suggests a warmer transition: “my mind lays restless until dawns light” (8).
Thank you for responding to this prompt :)
-Tara