"A light catches somewhere, finds human spirit to burn on...it dwells: slowly the light, its veracity unshaken, dies but moves to find a place to break out elsewhere; this light, tendance, neglect is human concern working with what is." - A. R. Ammons
Monday, October 15, 2012
We all live here
Hands and feet
or drifting fins
paws
claws
or wings to soar
Thank you for posting :). I think I've been noticing a theme rising out of the workshop; there seems to be an ongoing dialogue supported by structural minimalism. You and Chris chose to focus on topics that are grand: the life of birds, the life of all the “Creatures of the Earth” (6), but do so by creating a formal contrast that envelops these topics in a small space. This is a neat thing, am I'm curious to see where the rest of the workshop will take you.
Your title, “We all live here,” begins to describe what seems to be a main goal of the poem which is the perspective of all things inhabiting the Earth, and an acknowledgment that they do. There are different perspectives involved in this poem which seem to be a driving force in the material. Humans, water-life, birds and ground animals are all considered as “Creatures of the Earth” (6): “fins” (2), “paws” (3), “claws” (4), and “wings” (5). The last line of the poem has words that are specifically capitalized: “Creatures” and “Earth” (6), which creates a sense of focus and strong emphasis. This concept also creates an interchangeable reality between the last line of the poem and the title itself, where due to grammatical and independent attributes, either could seem to function as a heading. Both lines could also be read together: “We all live here, Creatures of the Earth,” which is also a unique element in the poem.
I remember you mentioning earlier that you wanted to create a lengthier poem-- I think this could be an interesting challenge for you to try. However, a minimalist poem can often 'be finished' as a draft regardless of the fact that it is small, so I wouldn't necessarily add lines simply to correct for structure or because it appears too short. I think expansion as a concept is always a good possibility though, and it might be fun to let yourself choose more than one perspective-- perhaps a crocodile and a panda bear or something random, and see how those two speakers could correlate within one poetic space. Would they meet in the empty space that separates two stanzas, or would their perspectives create a dialogue in considering one another? Just a thought, you don't actually have to consider it :)
Thank you for writing and I look forward to see where this takes you!
Hello Jessi,
ReplyDeleteThank you for posting :). I think I've been noticing a theme rising out of the workshop; there seems to be an ongoing dialogue supported by structural minimalism. You and Chris chose to focus on topics that are grand: the life of birds, the life of all the “Creatures of the Earth” (6), but do so by creating a formal contrast that envelops these topics in a small space. This is a neat thing, am I'm curious to see where the rest of the workshop will take you.
Your title, “We all live here,” begins to describe what seems to be a main goal of the poem which is the perspective of all things inhabiting the Earth, and an acknowledgment that they do. There are different perspectives involved in this poem which seem to be a driving force in the material. Humans, water-life, birds and ground animals are all considered as “Creatures of the Earth” (6): “fins” (2), “paws” (3), “claws” (4), and “wings” (5). The last line of the poem has words that are specifically capitalized: “Creatures” and “Earth” (6), which creates a sense of focus and strong emphasis. This concept also creates an interchangeable reality between the last line of the poem and the title itself, where due to grammatical and independent attributes, either could seem to function as a heading. Both lines could also be read together: “We all live here, Creatures of the Earth,” which is also a unique element in the poem.
I remember you mentioning earlier that you wanted to create a lengthier poem-- I think this could be an interesting challenge for you to try. However, a minimalist poem can often 'be finished' as a draft regardless of the fact that it is small, so I wouldn't necessarily add lines simply to correct for structure or because it appears too short. I think expansion as a concept is always a good possibility though, and it might be fun to let yourself choose more than one perspective-- perhaps a crocodile and a panda bear or something random, and see how those two speakers could correlate within one poetic space. Would they meet in the empty space that separates two stanzas, or would their perspectives create a dialogue in considering one another? Just a thought, you don't actually have to consider it :)
Thank you for writing and I look forward to see where this takes you!
-Tara